If it's a trans male, yeah that's on the gay spectrum (if you're a dude). If it's a trans female, seems closer to the hetero side of the spectrum. I think it makes a lot more sense to think about sexuality on a spectrum and we're all dots somewhere along that spectrum. Some people are super gay, some are super hetero, and a lot in between.
Treating sexual attraction like it's only two choices: fully gay or fully hetero, just fails to acknowledge the reality that a lot of people might "identify" with one part of that spectrum but their actions show they land maybe somewhere just to the side of that.
If you fuck someone who is trans, I wouldn't just automatically call that sex with a man.
- If the person has a dick and boobs, how do you decide (for purposes of this "am i gay" argument) if they are male or female?
- What about Mixed Gonadal Dysgenesis? It's an intersex condition, in which there are some male structures (gonad, testis), as well as a uterus, vagina, and fallopian tubes. Congenital adrenal hyperplasia.
- What if they identify female but haven't transitioned? Are they male? What if they transitioned MtF with top and bottom surgery - are they female now?
- If a MtF gets bottom surgery and takes hormones and develops natural breasts, is that person still male?
- What if someone de-transitions and stops hormones, and never had surgery. Lets say you two hooked up before the transition, after it, and again after detransition - which of those experiences was the "gay" one?
The trouble with us identifying someone else as male/female based on presence of specific organs, is what if they don't have those organs? Or what if the organs don't look the way you'd expect? What if the tits are fake? What if she has a huge clit? What if FtM doesn't get bottom surgery but does get top? What about a cis female who is flat chested all her life? What about a cis male who has natural breasts even if fairly small? If we go by uterus yes/no, what if a cis girl doesn't have a uterous? What if she does but is just otherwise infertile? What if she just presents naturally with really masculine features, or has naturally high testosterone?